Kitchen Talks

"I love you, Mommy!" Rachel whispered out of the blue.

"What did you say?" I replied.  I then saw this face.

"I said, I love youuu!" Rachel replied.  "And I would loooove an apple too!"

It was about mid-morning so I agreed and she sat happily in the kitchen table to eat her snack.

We talked about her sisters and how much she misses them when "they tickle me or tell me their school stories."  As she was in the middle of her apple, she mumbled a little more, "I also miss my Daddy.  I like his jokes!"  I just nodded and reminded her that I can be fun too - then I started doing my happy dance.  She laugh for 3 seconds and while smiling widely she clearly stated:

"Mommy, you're silly..."  she paused for ½ second, "BUT my Daddy is funny!"

WOW, that hit home!  Why did this hit my confidence?  I'm not that boring of a mother, I think!  I should know better.  When a child gets sick, hurt, hungry, needs to be wiped, ask for help with Pj's or fix their hair, or just contention between the kids over who's going to be the one in the Chuck E. Cheese's prize line - Moms are always the first to be asked.  No doubt about it, we're the best!

Then the parallel reality sinks in: when treats are offered, tricks are displayed and "who wants a pillow fight?!?" is being yelled - Daddy is the hero!  We moms (who gave birth, suffered countless days of sleep deprivation, take care of endless loads of laundry and cook countless meals) are doomed at once.  Our itty-bitty motherly pride goes out the window.

Women and men are called to fulfill different roles in society as well as in parenthood.  Whether you spend hours around your kids or get home in time for a kiss and put them to bed, they know you love them and respond cheerfully to your requests without second thoughts.  I also realized that the idea "Daddies are funny, Mommies are (just) okay" came from some beloved Dad and Grandpa.  Silly guys!  I call this sweet manipulation.  So I feel muuuuch better after this realization!

Whenever and wherever I have this reminder from my girls and/or the men mentioned above (and I'm sure Andrew will be in the same boat pretty soon) I just let it pass and wait until someone asks for help in the bathroom or needs me to get them a drink from the kitchen.  Then I sneakily smile and pat myself on the back. (Yep, you're the helper-winner today as you will be tomorrow and after tomorrow...  I repeatedly remind myself)  And while everyone at home benefits from this cycle by having all their smallest needs and desires taken care of, I'm just glad to be in the middle and teach them the way.  Sometime soon they'll do everything by themselves (crossing our fingers here!)

(Hopefully, our chidren will fully understand our decisions and approaches as they become parents on their own, and when its needed most.  A full circle.)

As today's conversation in the kitchen shows, Rachel may have had her appetite filled with a simple fruit, but I learned that at the end of the day my motherly instinct is telling me that I was in the right place at the right time.  I just happen to be her mom, and I consider myself more than lucky to be able to serve.  And I will do so for the rest of my life.

Yes, fathers are (conveniently) good heroes, funny entertainers, and great providers.  And we're very grateful for them.  Mothers have their share too.  And we're infinitely thankful for their lifetime of service.

Think about the blessings and joys of motherhood.  And if you can, contact your Mom.

(Visit her, soon. Write her, today. Call her, now! Trust me, when she hears from you, she'll be doing her own silly, happy dance)

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And yes, again: Mothers like to hear very much I love you's, and miss you's, anytime!  Since we're busy*** we also often suffer from short-term memory loss so we frequently need to be reminded.  Even if it's in a manipulative but loving way.  :)

*** Busy: transl. over-used, over-seen, over-rated, under-supported, under-appreciated, kaput homemaker, completely worn-out!  But being tired and stressed out happens just once in a while 'cause we are Super-Moms, remember?